The Art of Seduction
by God Emperor Penguin
Summary: To fund her schemes, Cinder needs a quick influx of cash. So she decides to broadcast her art of seducing young men to the world… only, it doesn't go quite according to…


**Summary: **_To fund her schemes, Cinder needs a quick influx of cash. So she decides to broadcast her art of seducing young men to the__world__… __only, it doesn't go quite according to__…_

**The Art of Seduction**

**RWBY**

_Written from the perspective of Cinder Fall_

* * *

Time is money.

My plan needed time.

Therefore, my tangled web of masterful schemes and grand lies required extraordinary funds to support… _but alas_. Roman was good for a quick buck or two - but he was a drop in the bucket to the tidal wave of expenses.

As usual, I must take matters into my own hands.

I commissioned Mercury to follow me with a camera.

Females have delightfully more methods of acquiring money than the less refined sex. And I am a patron of the arts… so why wouldn't I make money broadcasting lessons on the _finer_ points of seduction?

Males are so easily tamed.

"Mercury, come," I said.

"_Hn._"

My gray-haired companion grunted. Emerald was not far behind, eating a bag of sliced potatoes fried to a crisp - I believe they were called potato chips. This was strange to me because they did not resemble chocolate chips. And rocks also chip.

Note to self: _find out what the definition of chips are for the master plan._

We entered the cafeteria.

Not many people today.

That was fine. We should keep a low profile, lest my viewers become intimately aware of where the filming was taking place. Fans can become rather… _eccentric_.

Who shall be my first subject?

Ah… there in the corner.

The blonde boy. The companion of Pyrrha Nikos; the Goddess of Victory.

A worthy prey.

I unbuttoned the first three buttons from the top and approached.

"Hello," I greeted. My smile could charm a thousand warriors to lay down their arms.

"Yeah?"

The blonde boy looked up at me, tilted his head, and went back to eating his peas and chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs. Laid open beside him was a textbook. Ah, using lunchtime to study - efficient. I liked that in a man.

"How are you?"

I leaned forward. My shirt was loosened. Undoubtedly, his eyes would wander…

"I'm cool. You're that visiting student, right? That's great. I've heard good things about your school. How are you?"

His eyes never left the textbook.

"I'm good."

I turned towards the camera. Mercury was watching with the same bored expression as usual. Emerald was beside him, now armed with a bag of popcorn.

"S-so… nice weather, huh?"

Small talk. Small talk. Have to initiate small talk for the grand master plan.

"Uh… we had three hurricanes in the past week."

"Yeah! Totally! I mean like, yeah-bad weather-bad bad weather…"

The realization stunned me. How could I have been so stupid. My strategy was breaking down… okay. Primary strategy has failed. Proceed with the secondary strategy.

"You like chicken?"

He looked up at me.

"I like chicken."

I felt the sweat profuse from my forehead. Oh g-was I breaking out? Please don't. It took the blood of a thousand oxen and hours of bathing in their livers to achieve this perfect pastel complexion.

"Uh… don't take this the wrong way but do you need something?" The boy looked back down on his textbook. "I'm trying to study for an afternoon quiz."

"Um-ah is that so… ah…"

I'm losing him!

Desperate measures! Let me show the full measure of my devotion. I _am_ a seductress. I could capture the heart of any male on this earth!

"Here! Take this!"

I grabbed his lunch tray and poured the wet peas and chicken nuggets down my shirt.

Then I proceeded to fondle myself with the sensuality of an exotic dancer. I could feel the thousands of green orbs within my uniform blouse turn to mush as they pressed against my skin and silk brasserie. The chicken nuggets pressed against me, like candle wax, and excited myself.

Yes, he must be feeling the heat too-

"Uh… lady? That's my lunch…"

Mercury yawned. Emerald continued munching on her popcorn.

Everyone in the cafeteria was staring at me.

All of this was being broadcasted to all my subscribers at home.

No…

This can't be…

He was suppose to fall over like a feeble house of cards…

"_This wasn't part of the plan!_" I screamed, running out of the cafeteria.

The better part of the day was spent sobbing into my bed pillow.

Emerald sighed. Mercury shrugged.

I told the two to get lost for the rest of the day.

Still, we had made a lot of money. Apparently the video had achieved almost ten million hits. I was 'famous' but not because of my masterful planning or intricate scheming. I guess that was some solace...

_No._

I was the butt of jokes…

I wiped a tear away from my eyes.

I'm just a simple girl with a complicated master plan that nobody could understand…

_Sigh._

_Knock knock._

I crawled out of bed. I looked like a mess. The shower could remove the mushy peas and limp chicken nuggets from my flesh but it couldn't eradicate the stench of shame.

Opening the door, I said a soft hello.

"Hey."

It was the boy again.

"W-what do you want?"

His face was about to bring me back to tears.

"Uh… look, lady. I don't know you but… I guess that you're going through some rough times?"

"Y-yes… I am," I said. Averting my gaze from him, I felt my heartbeat quicken and my pulse rise. The temperature in my cheeks was rising.

If he sees my blush, how can I stay in control?

"So yeah, here."

He handed me a box of frozen chicken nuggets. He scratched the back of his head. "I assume you liked these? I mean, you kind of ran off with all of mine in your shirt so… and these are the premium ones shaped like dinosaurs. I like to bite the heads off before I eat the rest."

Oh. "Th-thanks," I said, feeling nervous.

The gesture was flattering.

"Well. See ya."

See ya-wa-wai-

"Wait!"

"Huh?"

I clutched the box of dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets close to my chest. I couldn't bring myself to look him directly in the eye.

"W-would you like to… um… eat these together? A-and… movie… maybe…?"

"Sure."

Death by happiness was a real possibility that was not considered in my plans at all.

"I gotta study. Mind if I read during the movie?

"B-by all means. Do as you like."

"Sweet. So uh, know anything about the hypothesis of '_Grimm Mating Rituals'_?"

I smiled as I welcomed him into my dorm.

_Ha_. All according to keikaku.

* * *

_The Art of Seduction Fin_

**Author's Notes:** _keikaku means plan._


End file.
